Pakistan

As the bride, Hina wore red. As the groom, Albert wore white. As the officiant, I was instructed to wear any other bright color, so I wore apricot. I was delighted to participate in this multicultural wedding with family members gathering from Pakistan and Spain, and friends gathering from around the world.

A Pakistani wedding has many traditions. The Mehndi was my first experience with henna. Both sides of the family participated, and besides the beautiful art on my hand, I enjoyed playing cards with Albert’s aunt who let me practice my limited Spanish and meeting Hina’s cousin who told me not to worry, that they would protect me (a humorous reference to the fact that Muslims and Christians were gathering in the same space).

The food at the reception was amazing. It is sad that Mezban, the restaurant that catered it, is no longer in business, but I can direct you to other great Pakistani food in California. Unless I say otherwise, just assume that I also ate one of my favorites, aloo palak (spinach and potatoes) or chana masala (garbanzos in a delicious sauce):

· I have eaten at Gul Naz Cuisine of Pakistan in Colton many times and most recently with Karina. Try the fried bread!

· Zareen's in Palo Alto has a long line to order, communal tables or take out, good selection, and great taste. It’s a quick casual way to try Pakistani food.

· Al Karam Pakistani Cuisine in Riverside where I ate with Lori has a dessert that is new to me, gajar halwa made of fresh grated carrots, milk, cream, sugar, and coconut flakes.

· When I picked up food from Anarkali in Concord with my Mom and Dad, we had aloo gobhi (cauliflower and potatoes), tandoori roti (whole wheat bread baked in a clay oven), aloo naan (naan stuffed with potatoes), raita (cucumber yogurt dip), mango chutney, and rasmalai cake: https://shwetainthekitchen.com/rasmalai-cake/

· Amy and I agreed when we ate at Mirchi in Riverside that we would only have something new, so we both ordered haleem, which has three kinds of lentils, rich spicing, and caramelized onion with a choice of meat. I chose to have the shredded chicken. Beef, goat, and brains were other options.

Hina recommends that I try Zam Zam Market on Inglewood Ave in Hawthorne for the goat biryani: https://www.bigoven.com/recipe/pakistani-goat-biryani/454527 and the goat pulao which they only make on Fridays: https://www.mirchitales.com/yakhni-pulao-mutton-yakhni-pulao-goat-meat-pilaf/ (click around from here for more Pakistani recipes). Albert recommends eating halwa puri for breakfast: https://www.wikihow.com/Make-Halwa-Puri

Yes, it is easy to find Pakistani food in California, but I love it so much that for my birthday in 2019, Suzy gifted me with the experience of being taught how to make Pakistani food by Chef Sara from CozyMeal in the San Francisco Bay area. Carmyn joined Suzy and me in in Mom's kitchen where we made rice, roti, the most amazing lentil curry I have ever had and:

· Chicken karahi curry, which Sara called Pakistan's official dish: https://www.teaforturmeric.com/chicken-karahi/

· Chicken tikka masala, which was apparently created in England by a Pakistani restaurant owner. See this link for both a recipe and the story: https://www.daringgourmet.com/chicken-tikka-masala-recipe/

Let me give you some notes on authenticity however: I once was driven by a Pakistani Lyft driver who doesn't like any of the Pakistani restaurants in the United States because the meat isn't fresh enough and must be slaughtered on the same day that it is eaten. Hina disagrees, but says that you can’t do take out with Pakistani food. You must eat it while it is hot in a real ceramic dish.

There is plenty to read from Pakistan. I read Exit West by Mohsin Hamid with my ROHO book group. I didn’t feel that I had visited Pakistan after reading it, but I was interested in this unique perspective of the refugee experience. I read I Am Malala by Malala Yousafzai with my AAUW book group. A friend of mine just saw her speak a few weeks ago in Pasadena and I continue to be impressed by Yousafzai’s activism to provide education for women. Both books are good, but when Hina recommended Kartography by Kamila Shamsie, I quickly found it on Hoopla and I love Shamsie’s characters, her sense of humor, and the way she puts together a sentence. This is the book I was looking for to get a sense of the people of Pakistan.

I want to add two more works of literature to this list:

· Poems by Muhammad Iqbal: https://mypoeticside.com/poets/sir-muhammad-iqbal-poems

· A short story by Saadat Hansan Manto about the insanity of partition: https://www.wordswithoutborders.org/article/toba-tek-singh

For Pakistani movies this week, I watched Saawan on Netflix (an amazing trek based on a true story) and the documentary Bhutto: Democracy Was Her Greatest Revenge on Kanopy (both an engaging story and a survey of more than fifty years of Pakistani history). I would like to watch the drama series called Zindagi Gulzar Hai that Hina has watched three times. The first episode is here with others also available, but I can’t find subtitles, so you might need to know Urdu to understand it: https://www.dailymotion.com/video/xwhfyd

I am enjoying the music of Pakistan, starting with the traditional music, but don’t miss the recent music:

· Traditional vocals: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7fErlzweILo

· Traditional instruments: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=36iDMabyg8U

· One of the most famous Pakistani singers, Rahat Fateh Ali Khan, singing with Momina Mustehsan: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kw4tT7SCmaY

· A recent upbeat song that I love (you might have noticed that Coke Studio is a great place to listen to Pakistani songs): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GR5U85eo4yQ&list=PL39z-AAkkatsGnw9Ds2Tv5Lh0Oo8N3U0n

· Albert’s favorite Pakistani musician, Arooj Aftab in her Tiny Desk Concert: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZUYJ8_tBSSQ

Two fun activities to watch from Pakistan include:

· The flag lowering ceremony that happens every day at the Wagah Border between Pakistan and India. This video starts with the crowd gathering, so you can skip to the four minute mark for the beginning of the ceremony, but wait for the quick handshake at the end before the gates close: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wmuo7BEcpv4

· A Pakistani Jhumar Dance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQymRL8KBxg

I missed the SoCal Eid festivals in May. Next year they will be in April, so I will keep an eye out for the Eid Mela in Artesia and the Eid Festival at Institute of Knowledge in Diamond Bar.

Hina tells me that her daughter, only about two years old, loves henna and is learning the Urdu alphabet and the script. The little one can speak with her grandmother in Urdu even though it is complex and has so many different ways to say something.

If you go to Pakistan, Hina recommends seeing Lahore, a city of gardens; Punjab, which is lush and green; Karachi, which is huge; Murri, a mountain resort town; and Kashmir, a gorgeous place, but only for the adventurous. Here are a few more recommendations https://www.wanderlust.co.uk/content/things-to-do-in-pakistan/ and yes, I would love to go! I look forward to a time when we can all travel, and hope we all survive, thrive, recognize our mutual humanity, learn to deal with our conflicts, and allow peace, health, and safety to flourish in Pakistan and throughout the world.

Photo credit: Abuzar Xheikh https://unsplash.com/photos/bepm97XDdSI